10/07/2010

The Beard

I've gotten a question or two about Chuck Norris's beard. I've also heard a few people claim the beard is a source of power, that within every hair is the claimed soul of a fallen enemy. I personally have no way of knowing for sure, but the lore leads us to believe that Chuck Norris's beard is indestructible. This obviously means that the beard cannot be made of keratin (as normal beards/hair are). It is probably made from an unfathomably strong bio-alloy.

The toughness and resilience of the beard provides a great number of benefits:
- Armor covering a large percentage of the face.
- Enhanced tickling abilities (for the ladies).
- Makeshift weapon in dire situations.
- And likely much more.

Should you encounter bits of information about Chuck Norris's beard that you think I may not have heard, please let me know.

22 comments:

  1. I believe the beard is just a manifestation of Chuck Norris's true power which he tries to hold back.

    ReplyDelete
  2. i believe his beard is made of Kruppstahl. It's harder than any razorblade so no one can shave him.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Behind his beard, there is another fist :P

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm pretty sure his beard is optional, and he can retract it if he feels like.

    ReplyDelete
  5. he can probably stab you from behind with his beard through your lungs and heart and claim it's just sauce :)
    oh yeah, and it's ideal for lock picking

    ReplyDelete
  6. He should submit himself to Shick or Gillette for research purposes.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I've heard chuck norris' beard is so absorbent that It could absorb BOTH oceans at the same time.

    ReplyDelete
  8. It makes excellent insulation for your house or thermal mug.
    Careful! Don't let it get in contact with your hair or it will turn gray and fall out.

    ReplyDelete
  9. chuck norris blog. i can follow this.

    and also the beard can probably be used to hide weapons.

    ReplyDelete
  10. The beard is there to hide his shitty acting.

    ReplyDelete
  11. As much as I like Chuck Norris, I still think Clint Eastwood could kick his ass.

    ReplyDelete
  12. that would explain him having the same beard for who knows how long..

    ReplyDelete
  13. Well, steel-wool comes from there..

    ReplyDelete
  14. there is also a fist in his beard, don't forget about that!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Pretty sure he's hiding his 3rd arm in there to pull off amazing combos.

    ReplyDelete
  16. The proved on family guy that behind his beard is another first...

    ReplyDelete
  17. I once found a clam on the beach that had Chuck Norris' beard.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I heard chuck norris' beard fights crime when chuck norris is asleep.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Its made of ginger bread. Yeah I said it.

    ReplyDelete
  20. This is really cool, keep it up looking forward to more.

    ReplyDelete